Motivation!

Personal crap you can skip if you just want to get to the point

I have A LOT to do in the next few weeks. Home involves being a single mom with an infant and a 4 year old and moving, and at work there are BIG time projects. If you know anything about EHR/ EMR and implementation take your worst nightmare involving it and multiply it by something unholy- like spam.

I get overwhelmed.  I am (read can be) an incredibly productive person, but when the opportunity arrives to tackle those things on my lists I kinda freeze.  Sure, I'm tired.  I have an infant, a 4 year old, a full time job... I have a right to relax.  And of course I decide to not only take on -and by take on I mean I freely volunteered,-and by freely volunteered I mean it was all my idea- a pretty large enterprise to get together backpacks for the homeless... I digress.

But what I do isn't just relaxing.  It's a little something I like to call pretending the outside world doesn't exist. 

This can be a useful tool for regrouping- a reason why I love rainy days.  What I have been doing is not the healthy,-useful-tool-for-relaxing kind of way. It's more of the avoiding-reality-and-the-fact-that-I-have-responsibilities (and really much more than normal) that-I-really-should-have-already-started-on kind of way. So instead of helping it just makes things harder.  It increases my desire to continue to pretend that the outside world doesn't exist.

Motivation- what you can do

1. One day at a time.  Seriously- you can only do what you can do.  Yes, it's smart to plan ahead- But don't let tomorrow consume you.  I can work on this myself, especially lately. 

There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly live.
— Dalai Lama

Go browse Dalai Lama and Zen quotes on Pinterest if you have a hard time with this.  He's a smart dude. He knows what he's talking about.

 I'm a list person.  Try making a couple of lists- a list for today (I make the ones that need to get done today stand out) and a list for things to attend in the future.  I started doing this at work, but now I do it at home, too. Writing it down helps get it out of your head.  You don't have to worry about forgetting it.  And it's there to add to your "today list" tomorrow.  

2. Surround yourself with positivity.  I LOVE quotes.  I collect them on notebooks, on Pinterest, I put them in places I'll see them- write it on the calendar, tack it up at work.  If I really need to remind myself of something I use a dry erase marker on the mirror, or put it eye level in a spot where things don't belong so it will catch my eye.  I set my desk top back ground.  

Also, pay attention to the company you keep.  I had a clean break from the friends in my life when I was 21 or so.  It was super tough at the time, but since then I have been able to chose who is and isn't a part of my life.  I can get amped up very easily.  I also believe that positive thinking is necessary for a happy, healthy life.  I don't needed added stress and drama- I have enough stressers and personal issues I need to work through.  NEGATIVITY IS A DISTRACTION FROM BEING THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF.   

3. Create a dream board.  I'm going to do this. I'll make it for life goals- figure out what I want. Remind myself I am moving towards something- and I can pick the direction I go. When I need a break I'll get creative instead of shutting down- and I'll give myself a time limit. I may start with Pinterest, then look into those smash book things I've heard about. Seems perfect for me. I like the idea of journaling, but don't want a "diary"-I'm nowhere near as profound as Anne Frank.  I'll theme the journals by a newly defined goal- or grouping of them.

4. Ask yourself what you want and set realistic goals. Woah.  You may think I planned this out, but I didn't even know I was going to list out the things on the picture until I started typing about lists.  I scrolled up to see number 4- and it looks like I just addressed how I plan to deal with this in 3.  And 3 is the reason I decided to make a blog after posting the picture on FB and saying I want to create a dream board to stay motivated.  Full circle... that I suppose you didn't need to know about.

But really- HOW CAN WE ACHIEVE HAPPINESS IF WE NEVER DEFINE WHAT IT IS THAT WILL MAKE US HAPPY?

5. Reward yourself.  I can't tell you how to go about it, but pick something that makes you happy.  If I get all this work done I'll drive an hour to the beach and take a walk. Or if cut my spending by x amount I'll get to do this with a percentage of what I saved.  Or I spent so many hours working on this skill I want, now I can get a tool or book that will further it, and I proved I'll use it.

6. & 7. Believe in yourself & acknowlede your attributes.  Do what it says.  Self doubt and low self esteem make you just as egotistical as someone who is full of themselves.  And it gets in the way of you being happy and achieving goals.  Everyone has flaws and good qualities.  Recognize what you excel at just as much as what you dislike about yourself so you can make some progress!  So cut the crap and know you can do it.

8. Recognize your progress.  And congratulate yourself.   I find getting a little bit done keeps me going.  Recognizing what you accomplished makes the rest lest daunting.

9. Visualize accomplishing your goals. You're more likely to succeed if you tell yourself you can than if you tell yourself you can't.

10. Be kind to yourself.  I can be a huge jerk to myself.  It slows us down if we're busy being mean to ourselves.  Imagine you're trying to lose weight.  2 weeks in you gain instead of lose.  Instead of being mean and discouraged- making us more likely to quit- saying, "I did really well for two weeks, I'll start over on Saturday and this time I know I can make it two weeks, but I'll aim for three weeks!"  Talk to yourself and forgive yourself for your perceived shortcomings as you would someone you love.  If you have kids this is a big one- they will learn how to treat themselves from how you treat yourself. 

11. Don't compare yourself to others.  Life isn't a contest.  Anyone who says it is is doing it wrong.  There will always be people more experienced or naturally good at certain things.  We all have our strengths and weaknesses... and now I'm turning into a broken record.

Ironically, this post took a lot of time away from all the things I planned on doing this morning... I'm feeling overwhelmed, but I'll get going on my list.  And

Anne Frank

One of my all time favorite quotes... and how old was she?  If she could feel that way, I sure as hell better figure it out. some others by her:

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.

Whoever is happy will make others happy too.

How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.


The final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands.

It's really a wonder that I haven't dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.
Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter if only we could prevent girls from being girls.

And finally I twist my heart round again, so that the bad is on the outside and the good is on the inside, and keep on trying to find a way of becoming what I would so like to be, and could be, if there weren't any other people living in the world.

I must uphold my ideals, for perhaps the time will come when I shall be able to carry them out.

Who would ever think that so much went on in the soul of a young girl?

I don't think of all the misery but of the beauty that still remains.

No one has ever become poor by giving.

Everyone has inside of him a piece of good news. The good news is that you don't know how great you can be! How much you can love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is!

Happy Nerd Makes More Work

♥ Alice, ♥ The Doctor

Thanks to TeeFury I now own t-shirts with the following images.  I was doing so well with not spending money... then I saw this.  I love Alice in Wonderland- and have loved those books for so long.  And Princess Aurora was my first favorite princess.

 

And, if I  bought two t-shirts I got a FREE sticker play set.  Seriously, tell me how I was supposed to say no to that.

Then... I got TWO sets.  One to play with, one to save in pristine condition.

It's the little things.

Now I own two of these sticker play sets.

This improves my quality of life.  

For serious.

Simple Ways to Improve Everyday

Feel free to skip half way down to get to the intended content - stuff to help make your day more enjoyable and life a little brighter.  

Some History

I have struggled with depression since I was in elementary school.   I am a functioning adult; I go to work, I have two kids, there is food in my kitchen, I pay my bills, my house is clean...relatively.  Full disclosure: I do not and never have separated my whites from my colors.  Many people are surprised if they find out that I, a "normal" suffers from depression.  I'm not really sure how I keep it separated, but I must have learned young.

Many days I am convinced nothing will ever improve.  I cried miserably every day at 6- at least once. I remember loathing myself at 8.  I started physically harming myself in middle school, I've have had suicidal thoughts on and off since 12.

Depression  has been a silent companion.  Heavy and predictable.

During my last pregnancy I had a few challenges. I've been anxious before, but I experienced anxiety in an intensely horrifying way.  I would lose control of my emotions, of my actions, of my words.

A couple weeks before the baby was born my husband moved out.  I was terrified of having a stroke, of going into labor while alone with my 4 year old, of living alone.  I would start to worry and obsess, then lose control of all rational thought.  With rational thoughts leaving the party you can bet rational actions we're right there with them.

Anyhow, fast forward to now.  I have a 4 year old who shows no jealousy and a whole lot of empathy, and a 4 month old whose general mood is better than any baby's mood has a right to be.

I have adapted fairly well.  Like I said, my house is clean... relatively.  The kids are fed and wearing clean clothes... although currently the 4 year old has a beard comprised of green hopefully-not-permanent-marker scribble.  Childcare is a little more than half of what I bring home a month.  Prior to 6 months ago there was no need for daycare, I didn't foresee how large an impact it would have financially.  There are also other stresses that have to do with work, raising two little ones and maintaining a home, a challenging relationship with my husband, and with family and friends knowing my situation as well has having opinions on it- which obviously they are allowed to have them.        

(Sidebar: I talk a lot.  About a lot of things.  A lot of the time.  I am comfortable talking about all sorts of things, and I think people just assume I'm an open book. 

As I mentioned above, many people are surprised if they find out I have a long, consistent history of depression.  Not only do I not talk about certain things, but I tend to not even notice me thinking them- never mind working through them.  I've been asked why I was crying the previous day, and I think, "I was crying?"  I'm not saying it is healthy, but it probably has a good deal to do with how I've kept it "under the radar.")

In spite of surviving, and maybe even appearing as thriving, I still get anxious and spend a fair amount of time with a pessimistic mindset.

What you allow is what will continue.

Original intended content before I decided to include a history 

I am a firm believer that we are responsible for our own actions and what happens in our life.  Ultimately, we are responsible for our own happiness.  I believe that to a large extent we have control over our thought patterns.  I haven't studied it, but I tend to have pretty good instincts.  If we allow ourselves to feel anxious or hateful it's easy for it to become a norm.  I've used a metaphor:  It's a lot easier to redirect the flow of a smaller stream than to redirect the Colorado River.  The Grand Canyon isn't going to move easily.  This implies that at some point it's too late- or near impossible.  

Every couple of years I write out a list of things that make me happy.  I encourage you to make your own list of things you love and make you happy.  I don't know why I started doing it. Sometimes I am pleasantly surprised by finding past lists.  I am lucky that even though I can be so sad, I can also be so easily delighted.  Little things make me smile. Medium things excite me.  Big things consume me.

She was a girl who knew how to be happy even when she was sad.  And that's important, you know. -Marilyn Monroe

I have been consistently crankier.  It could be hormones, and it definitely has something to do with my current circumstances.  I don't want to be impatient and critical, easily agitated.  I don't like me when I'm like that.  And I'm like that because I'm already unhappy- it's a cruel cycle.  

I've devised a plan of attack.  Actively add little things from the list  to daily life to improve perspective.  I am diverting the stream of my persistent antagonistic mood before it becomes my standard attitude.

Some Examples Of How I Improve Everyday

 I love quotes.  I cannot tell you how much. My Pinterest is littered with them. Point is, other peoples' words inspire me.  So I use them.   I write them on my mirrors and windows with dry erase markers, I tack them up at work, write them on my calendar, leave one in my wallet, set the desk top back ground, you get the picture.  

Things that inspire me or to remind me of things I need to "hear." (like to the right)   I have hangings from when I saw the Dalai Lama in places where I may need certain messages.  

By the way, the Dalai Lama is on the list of things that I love/make me happy.  Seeing him speak was amazing.  Looking at his picture right now is making me happy. 

I love reading.  When I've had enough of reality fiction is the place for me! 

I love bubbles.  I can't explain it.  They make me giddy. I think I'm going to start carrying some with me.... for the kids...

The Beatles.  The Fab Four.  In high school it was Rubber Soul and Revolver.  Now I really enjoy their older stuff, recordings from before they had records.  When people used to share songs.  I Wanna Hold Your Hand in German.  Their first 4 albums and Abby Road.  I know this can't be original, but if I had a daughter my first pregnancy I wanted to name her Abby Rose.  I've loved them since middle school.  Sometimes I listen to their entire discography in a day.  Everyone needs happy music.

Sometimes I listen to Mantras and/or Tibetan throat singing.  I also have mala beads for when I want to chant my own mantra.  I could go into the benefits, but I'll save that for another time.

 I love being outside.  Even sitting on the porch really soothes me.   I love walking in the woods. (Not to be confused with running- never running.)  I love watching storms, the smell of electricity in the air.  I love how quiet it is after it snows. I can't always go outside, but my mental health is much improved when I get regular outside time.

I love the rain.  I currently have sky lights, so it sounds so neat.  I like the feeling of a rainy day and being cooped up inside- as long as it isn't the 15th rainy day I'm feeling.  And when it's warmer I love being in the rain.

I'm a bit of a dork.  It's okay, I'm completely comfortable with that.  I love Doctor Who. ♥♥  I got the cookie jar for my birthday a couple years ago.  I keep it at work- most people don't even know what it is.  Their loss.  When I'm having an especially rough day I open the lid, and the sound of the Tardis makes me smile.  

I also have an awesome sticker play set with Doctor Who and Disney Princesses for when things are really harry.  I'll have to get a picture.

I even indulged in a couple of nerdy female t-shirts.  I'm happier when I wear them.  I wear them on days I have extra chores or errands.

I have always loved purple pens.  It's my favorite color to write in.  It doesn't matter what I'm writing- it can be a shopping list or a message from my voice mail at work- it's better if it's written with a purple pen.  I haven't had a purple pen since high school 10 years ago.  A few weeks ago I got a purple pen.  I love it.

Coffee.  There is definitely something delightful of having my coffee from MY mug.  This can backfire, if someone heartless has gotten to my mug first.  Now I have a back up. 

I love water.  There isn't time for baths or swimming in the tropics these days, but a hot shower does wonders!  

I like making things.  I have gotten into jewelry making, crocheting, drawing, scrap booking, and tons of other things.  Even coloring.  Who doesn't like coloring.  (If you don't please realize that was rhetorical.)  Now I get to create and do fun projects with the kids, too.

Being creative really lets me use the part of my brain I'm forever trying to put away.  

Most recently I started a project to provide homeless with backpacks filled with necessities. My current goal is 150 backpacks, to pass them out in a city, and record it to inspire others.  Check it out at The Positivity Project.

I'm going to try to start making this list a few times a year.  I'm going to start doing to same with goals, or things I'd like to get out of life.  Practicing more Reiki, Tai Chi and Qi Gong will improve so many things.  And there is a lot I want to learn, see and accomplish.  If it's on the list for 2 years maybe I'll realize it's time to do something about it.

This is way lengthier and took way longer than I thought it would.  I hope there is something here that can either help you make mundane days a little more enjoyable, or allow you to help make someone else's day better.

Chakra Overview

When it comes to researching things on the internet, like chakras, you will find a lot of shit.  There is so much information out there.  I suppose that is true with anything.  I just spent the last half hour going googling chakras and most of it I wouldn't recommend.  Chakras are not new age nonsense, but I couldn't blame you if you believed that.

http://www.medical-look.com/human_anatomy/organs/Spinal_nerves.html

Chakras were written about in the Indian Vedas (an ancient set of doctrines consisting of mostly sacred hymns and rituals for a priest like class in India.)  Chakra is Sanskrit for wheel or disc.  Now that we are more advanced in medicine we now know that these chakras are located by the 7 major nerve ganglia along the spinal column.

I am very excited about this picture to the left.  I found it on a medical site, and it shows what those nerves are connected to.  I have a list I will share of what each chakra involves, as far as I know.

The chakras forms a column in our bodies called the sushumna.

Chakra locations

When I was first learning about the chakras I noticed that the physical and mental connections made a lot of sense.  People I knew where certain physical ailments had the corresponding mental affliction(s).  Eastern medicine (or what I know of it) to me is fascinating: Treating before the physical develops, maintaining energy balance (yin and yang.)  It can be very enlightening in understanding ourselves and others.

Chakra One starts at the base, and they work to the top.

This picture was taken from a site with more information than most people would need.  But it covers a lot of information for people who pretty much already know everything I've posted here.


The following is very limited information.  I intend to put up more information on each chakra at some point.  These are the basics I got off a paper from taking various sorts of classes and my Reiki certification from a wonderful woman I know.


Muladhara

• is located at the base of spine/ perineum.
• It's color is red, corresponding note is C.
• Deals with grounding and physical identity.
• Body parts are legs, feet, bones, with the adrenal gland, large intestine, blood and building of cells. 
• Malfunctions include obesity, anorexia, sciatica and constipation.

Swadhisthana  

• is located bellow the navel and above the gentitals
• It's color is orange, corresponding note is D.
• Deals with sexuality and emotional identity.
• Body parts are gonads, womb, genitals, kidney, bladder and lower back. 
• Malfunctions include sexual and urinary problems.

Manipura

• is located by the solar plexus.
• It's color is yellow, corresponding note is E (if you haven't already, you will start to notice a pattern here)
• Deals with will power and self esteem
• Body parts include pancreas, adrenals, digestive system, liver and gall bladder.
• Malfunctions can be digestive problems, chronic fatigue and hypertension.

 Anahata

• is located by the heart.
• It's color is green, it's corresponding note is F.
• Deals with feelings of unconditional love.
• Body parts are thymus, heart, lungs, circulatory system, arms and harnds.
• Malfunctions include asthma, coronary disease and lung disease.

Vissuha

• is located in the throat..
• It's color is blue, corresponding note is G.
• Deals with communication.
• Body parts include thyroid, parathyroid, throat, ears and mouth, neck and shoulders.
• Malfunctions yield sore throats, neck and shoulder pain, and thyroid trouble.

Ajna

• is located at the third eye.
• It's color is indigo, corresponding note is A.
• Deals with imagination, perception and intuition.
• Body parts are pineal gland, eyes, base of skull and brow.
• Malfunctions include vision problems, headaches and nightmares.

Sahasrara

• is located at the crown of your head.
• It's color is violet and white.
• Deals with spirituality.
• Body parts include pituitary glands, the central nervous system, and the cerebral cortex.
• Malfunction of this chakra are depression, alienation and confusion.

This really is just scratching the surface, but it's a basic overview.

No Negative Thoughts

1. I love quotes.  Seriously, love them.  You should see my Pinterest.  I have several boards with posts.
2. I have dealt with depression a better part of my life.  I have good days, and not so good days.
3. Sometimes I like to post things around to remind me or inspire me.  I want to shape my thought process.

In the past I have posted the Reiki precepts. When I get used to seeing it and don't notice it I try to switch it up. I don't always have things up, but it's nice.





Today I needed a boost, so I was looking around for something that fit. I started with " You are allowed to be happy" in my search. A little cheesy, but a good message for my FB page The Positivity Project.

I came across the below and thought it would be perfect to put up in a "zone."  I have an area with my Reiki and spiritual things.  It's near my bed, so another good concept for insomnia type nights.

What if I could manage to not have anxiety or depressed driven thoughts in an area out of habit?  Imagine the possibilities.  How I could shape my attitude for the future....  

I HAVE THE POWER

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself; I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.  I chose which it shall be.  Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet.  I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

         Found the quote, then set it to a picture I StumbledUpon and set as my desktop background.  I like to post things I find helpful to cultivating the mindset I want around, and the desktop back ground is great for that.